time to go back in January 27, 2008

this week i wound up being really tired.  i did write a letter on monday in the little red journal autumn and i send back and forth.  i spent tuesday and  wednesday with K.  thursday i came home and promptly went to sleep for two hours.  woke up at 7 and was too tired and unmotivated to do anything else.  friday i chilled out and read The Almost Moon with blankets and hot tea.  it was a cold week.  i think this had a lot to do with my lack of energy.  so this friday is Imbolc.  amethyst and i made a commitment to each other at the beginning of the year that we would celebrate all of the holidays together.  so we are going to get together this friday for the first sabbat of the year.  i finished re-reading amber k’s candlemas book.  there are some really good ideas in it.  basically the focus of imbolc is cleansing and purification.  light.  new year.  brigid.  amethyst and i are going to cook a proper feast but we haven’t planned the ritual yet.  i would like to focus on the creativity aspect of brigid since we just did the cleansing a few weeks ago.  but i do feel inspired by the cleansing and purification chapter and am going to dedicate this week to it.  not too long ago i did thoroughly clean and de-clutter but i’m going to do it again.  now would be a good time to get rid of the box of to-be-shred documents.  and i am a big fan of spring cleaning.  clutter and hidden dirt do accumulate so quickly and it always feels so good after a thorough cleaning.  and i am going to do the body/mind stuff too.  the book suggests fasting for 1-3 days.  i have never fasted before.  it kind of scares me.  mostly my ability to do it.  but i feel up to trying.  i think it will be a worthwhile experience and i’m sure i’ll learn some things about myself.  i just feel very much like getting into the spirit of this holy day.  it’s been in the back of my mind all month and honestly, looking back, i think i have been laying the groundwork for it all month.  and with Imbolc, i will be clearing out the final vestiges of all i want to be rid of, laying a fresh foundation for my new year goals to grow on.  so this week i will fast, come home and clean and de-clutter and end each evening with a ritual bath, meditation and light yoga.  i think i could benefit from going in.  i have felt myself become a bit unbalanced during the past week and a half.  one lesson that is hard to remember, acknowledge and live by is that when things start looking up and one feels good it’s easy to let go of the activities that got one there in the first place.  maintaining harmony and equilibrium is an ongoing process.  this will be my first holy week ever.  i have never ever celebrated in such a manner.  i’m kind of looking forward to it.